"The important thing is to not stop questioning." -Albert Einstein
you get blown away by experience and events and people and circumstances and then when your life comes to a screeching halt like the brakes on your volkswagen stopping for a bunny hopping across the street you feel like a mess of "who the hell am i"?
what is normal? what is abnormal? how can i gauge the change thats been going on in my life?
there are days when i literally feel like my body is disconnected from where i'm going and is separated into thought and questions. like i'm surrounded by a bubble of my own brain activity while simultaneously living out normal routine. i really can only say that what i have done for the past year has taken its toll on who i perceived "meagan shorey" to actually be. i don't operate the same way i used to. i dont really know how i operate at all. all i have is questions to figure out more and more about what actually is going on with me. is this what albert did? im sure he's a lot more creative with his questions seeing as how he, well, IS albert einstein. whatever.
i can't figure out where i stopped being who i was and started to be who i am now. maybe its just like the waves - the ebb and flow go with each other and form into one then split into two and you just start becoming this new wave without being aware. i'm a new jumble of a being. i am a traveler, a friend, an event planner, an activist, a quiet steady soul, an international connector, a giggling box of silly, an over-analytical worrier, a chatty cathy, an organizer, a quick wit...the list goes on.
all i know is that the meagan i knew is no longer and i'm still getting used to who i am now that life has slowed down...in a sense.