On the Road with Invisible Children’s Tri-state Team

On the Road with Invisible Children’s Tri-state Team

If you want to know what my life is like since August of 2010, you must check this out. This perfectly depicts us in ways I can't really do.

alberto got it right

"The important thing is to not stop questioning." -Albert Einstein

you get blown away by experience and events and people and circumstances and then when your life comes to a screeching halt like the brakes on your volkswagen stopping for a bunny hopping across the street you feel like a mess of "who the hell am i"?

what is normal? what is abnormal? how can i gauge the change thats been going on in my life?

there are days when i literally feel like my body is disconnected from where i'm going and is separated into thought and questions. like i'm surrounded by a bubble of my own brain activity while simultaneously living out normal routine. i really can only say that what i have done for the past year has taken its toll on who i perceived "meagan shorey" to actually be. i don't operate the same way i used to. i dont really know how i operate at all. all i have is questions to figure out more and more about what actually is going on with me. is this what albert did? im sure he's a lot more creative with his questions seeing as how he, well, IS albert einstein. whatever.

i can't figure out where i stopped being who i was and started to be who i am now. maybe its just like the waves - the ebb and flow go with each other and form into one then split into two and you just start becoming this new wave without being aware. i'm a new jumble of a being. i am a traveler, a friend, an event planner, an activist, a quiet steady soul, an international connector, a giggling box of silly, an over-analytical worrier, a chatty cathy, an organizer, a quick wit...the list goes on.

all i know is that the meagan i knew is no longer and i'm still getting used to who i am now that life has slowed down...in a sense.

cars

as an internal and external processor i seem to always be thinking through many different topics and then also speaking about them to others. i literally feel like my head is a heavy trafficked highway in the major cities of the world. information comes into my brain, zooms by, flicks off the ideas that slow it down, honks the horn and slowly processed emotions, and gives a "thank you wave" to the light bulb moments that carry clarity with them on their flatbeds. all of this passes through the synapses like the dashed yellow lines of the road, into the tunnel that is called my throat and out to the world through words and spoken curiosities...

i can't fight who i am. i can't block up my thoughts and keep them swirling around. the bumper to bumper realities in my corpus callosum tie together the realities of the dreams to the wishes to the fears to the confidence to the wonder to the harsh truths to everything.

i am sad. i am joyful. i am quiet. i am a chatterbox.


once again on the verge of saying goodbye - all i can really think about are the experiences i've shared and all i can do is spend time with the people who have been apart of that. i find myself in pain because i know that i have opened up my heart to something powerful, something real, something life changing and yet here i am - on the cusp of turning over a new leaf. taking all of my things and packing up yet again, just like the 20 weeks on the road of this past year of my life.

crazy.

embracing the goodness. embracing the change. embracing the people who have been a huge part of it all. just trying to soak it all up for these last few moments.